CHAPTER   XV.

Sister Emmerich's   Ecstasies and Prayer.

第十五章

艾曼丽修女的神魂超拔和祈祷

Among all   her privations, none was so painful to Sister Emmerich as the want of proper   spiritual direction. She had no one with whom she could confer on her   interior, no one to help her bear the burden that weighed her down.

在艾曼丽修女的所有苦难中，最令她痛苦的莫过于缺乏适当的灵修指导。没有一个人可以与她商讨内心的问题，没有一个人可以帮助她承受压在她身上的重担。

"Day   and night, " she says, " did I implore God to send me a priest to   whom I might lay open my interior, for I was often in dread of being deluded   by the evil spirit. This dread made me doubt everything, even what was before   my eyes, my sufferings, my consolations, my very existence itself. The Abbe   Lambert tried to quiet me ; but, as he knew little German, I was unable to   make him understand clearly, and my trouble always returned.

「日日夜夜，」她说，「我祈求天主派给我一位神父，使我可以向他敞开心扉，因为我常常害怕被邪灵迷惑。这种恐惧使我怀疑一切，甚至怀疑我眼前的一切，我的痛苦、我的安慰、我的存在本身。兰伯特神父试图让我安静下来；但是，因为他几乎不懂德语，我无法让他清楚地了解我的内心，于是我的怀疑和焦虑总是又回来了。

All that   was going on in my interior and around me I found perfectly incomprehensible,   ignorant peasant-girl that I was! Though it was the experience of my life, it   had never before disturbed me. The last four years in the convent were spent   in almost uninterrupted   contemplation and the incidents consequent   upon this state were multiplied. I could not render an account of them to   those that were ignorant of such things, they would have thought them simply   impossible. Whilst in this state, as I was praying alone in the church one   day, I distinctly heard this question: ‘Am I not sufficient for thee ?’ The   words made a profound impression on me."

在我的内心和我周围发生的一切，我发现我是一个完全不可理解、无知的农家姑娘！虽然这是我一生的经历，但这些经历以前从未困扰过我。在修道院的最后四年我几乎是在不间断的默观中度过的，因此这种状态所引起的事件成倍增加。我无法向那些对默观一无所知的人解释，他们会认为这是不可能的。在这种状态下，有一天我独自在教堂祈祷时，我清楚地听到了这句问话：『我的恩宠为你不够吗？』（格12：9）这句话给我留下了深刻的印象。」

It is not   astonishing that Anne Catherine left thus to herself was tormented by doubt   and anxiety. The gift of contemplation had been imparted to her for the   furtherance of her expiatory mission and, consequently, it entailed upon her   mental sufferings which, like her physical pains, corresponded to the state   of the Church at the time. Her soul gained strength and ripened in her   childhood from the rich contemplations presented to it, contemplations which   embraced the whole history of Redemption; now, if we may so express it, the   dark side of her visions was to be placed before her, that is the unfolding   of the mystery of iniquity, the combat of the enemy against the Church.

安纳．加大利纳．艾曼丽就这样独自一人受着怀疑和焦虑的折磨，这并不奇怪。默观的恩赐是为了促进她的赎罪使命而赋予她的，因此，默观给她带来了精神上的痛苦，就像她身体上的痛苦一样，与当时的教会状况相一致。她的灵魂在童年时期就从呈现给她的丰富默观中获得力量并逐渐成熟，这些默观包含了整个的救恩史；如果我们可以这样表达的话，她在神视中的阴暗面现在将被摆在她面前，那就是揭开罪恶之谜-----魔鬼对教会展开的战斗。

She must   now struggle against the malice and cunning of the evil one who glides into   the vineyard whilst the master sleeps, and sows the bad seed; she must   destroy it before it springs up and, clothed in the spiritual armor of purity   humility, and confidence in God, she must wrestle with the enemy in his   attacks on the sacred priesthood. In such encounters it is not the light of   contemplation, but strong and lively faith that insures the victory. The   father of lies may, indeed, cast her into mental agony, but he cannot shake   her faith. Anne Catherine had never wished for visions and extraordinary favors   and, when she first received them, she knew not that they were extraordinary,   she dreamed not of their being peculiar to herself; but as soon as the truth   dawned upon her, her chief care was to Submit them to the decision of her   director.

现在，艾曼丽必须与邪恶者的恶意和狡猾作斗争，魔鬼在主人睡觉时溜进葡萄园并播下坏种子；她必须在坏种子发芽之前将其摧毁，她必须穿上纯洁谦卑及信赖天主的精神盔甲，她必须在魔鬼攻击神圣的司铎时与之搏斗。在这样的相锋中，确保胜利的不是默观之光，而是坚强活泼的信德。谎言之父确实可以让艾曼丽陷入精神痛苦，但却无法动摇她的信仰。安纳．加大利纳．艾曼丽从沒有希望得到神视和超凡的恩惠，当她第一次收到这恩惠时，她并不知道神视是超凡的，她也没有梦想过这些特恩是她所独有的。不过，一旦她明白了真相，她最关心的就是把神视及特恩交给她的神师来决定。

Not her   visions, but her Faith formed the rule of her conduct; rather would she have   endured a thousand deaths than violate its holy teachings, and when the   tempter cast her into doubt and fear as to the origin of her supernatural   favors, it was by acts of this virtue that she put him to flight. In his rude   and oft-repeated assaults, Anne Catherine was deprived of spiritual   assistance from the ministers of the Church. In this she resembled the Church   herself whose episcopal sees lay vacant; whose flocks were wandering without   pastors to check the ever-increasing ravages of heresy, and whose Doctors no   longer raised a voice against the torrent of evils pouring in upon her on all   sides.

不是她的神视，而是她的信仰形成了她的行为准则；她宁愿忍受一千次死亡，也不愿违背教会神圣的教义，当诱惑者让她对超性恩惠的来源产生怀疑和恐惧时，正是通过这信德，她赶走了诱惑者。安纳．加大利纳在诱惑者粗暴且反复的攻击中，被剥夺了来自教会牧者的精神援助。在这一点上，她类似教会本身，教会的主教座席空缺；羊群四散，没有牧人警醒谨守,坚持真道,抵制异端邪说，教会的神学家不再大声疾呼，反对从四面八方涌入教会的邪恶洪流。

We cannot   with indifference behold in the midst of this desolation the poor little nun   of Dulmen, unfolding like a miraculous flower a beauty equal to any belonging   to preceding ages. When Sts. Teresa and Magdalen di Pazzi adorned the Church,   the Order of St. Ignatius was in its first bloom. It was rapidly spreading   throughout the Church to which it has given more saints and learned men than   any religous institute since the time of St. Francis and St. Dominic. When   Sts. Catherine of Sienna, Lidwina, and Colette embalmed her vineyard   with the fragrance of their virtues, the Church languished, it is true, in a   most distressing state; but beside these saints there arose in all countries   holy and learned souls. But no period was more desolate than that in which   the Master of the vineyard poured out upon the little shepherdess of Flamske   the plenitude of His graces.

在这片荒凉之中，我们不能忽视杜尔门可怜的小修女，她像一朵神奇的花，绽放出与以往任何时代都不相上下的美丽。当圣女大德兰和德．帕齐的玛大肋纳为教会增添光彩时，圣依纳爵修会刚刚展露头角。自圣方济和圣多明我时代以来，圣依纳爵修会为教会带来的圣人和学者比任何宗教机构都要多。当西安纳的圣女加大利纳、李维娜和科莱特用她们圣德的芬芳使教会葡萄园充满香气时，教会确实是在一种极其痛苦的状态中衰弱了，但除了这些圣人之外，各国都涌现出了圣洁而博学的灵魂。然而，最荒凉的时期莫过于葡萄园的主人向弗兰斯克的小牧羊女倾注祂全部恩宠的那个时期。

［译注：德．帕齐的玛丽亚玛大肋纳：1566 年 4 月 2 日 - 1607 年 5 月 25 日），是意大利加尔默罗会修女和神秘主义者。］

God gives   His gifts only on condition of faithful co-operation; if this be wanting,   they are withdrawn and bestowed upon others who will make a better use of   them. Thus does He act toward the mass of the faithful. At no period are the   power and mercy of God lessened; but, when vessels are wanting to receive the   superabundant riches of His gifts, He displays the wonders of His love in a   few faithful souls upon whom he bestows in addition to their own share, the   graces slighted by others. It is on this account that Anne Catherine's   privileges and sufferings have in them something extraordinary and imposing.

天主只有在信友忠实合作的条件下才会赐下祂的恩宠；如果缺乏这种合作，就会收回恩宠，并将其赋予那些能更好地使用恩宠的人。天主是这样对待广大信众的。在任何时期，天主的权能和仁慈从未减少过；但是，当缺少接受祂丰富恩宠的器皿时，祂会在少数忠信的灵魂身上彰显祂奇妙的爱，除了忠信的灵魂自己应得的那份恩宠外，还赐给他们被别人轻视的恩宠。正是由于这个原因，安纳．加大利纳的特恩和苦难才具有非同寻常的意义。

St.   Magdalen di Pazzi's ecstasies took place in a cloistered community where such   things were regarded with respect not unmingled with fear.Being   Novice-Mistress she was surrounded by her young pupils, who delighted in   speaking of God or His saints, that they might behold their Mistress rapt in   ecstasy. But Sister Emmerich's raptures often seized her in the midst of   companions who regarded her with uneasiness on that very account, and to whom   she was as insupportable as was the Church to the gross infidelity of the   period, because she dared still to celebrate the grandeur and magnificence of   God in His saints.

德．帕奇的圣玛大肋纳的神魂超拔发生在一个隐修会，在那里，人们尊重这些事情，而不是夹杂着恐惧。作为初学导师，圣玛大肋纳周围都是年轻的初学生，当她们谈论天主或圣人时，她们可能会看到她们的导师沉浸在神魂超拔中。但是，艾曼丽修女的神魂超拔常常让她的同伴感到不安，她们无法忍受她，就像教会在那个时期被众多不忠者所厌弃一样，因为艾曼丽修女仍然敢在圣人身上颂扬天主的伟大和辉煌。

"I   was frequently unable to resist the divine impulse, and I fell unconscious   before my companions. I was in choir one day, though not singing with the   rest, when I became rigid, and the nuns happening to push against me, I fell   to the ground. Whilst they were carrying me out, I saw a nun walking upon the   highest point of the roof where no one could go, and I was told that it was   Magdalen di Pazzi, who had borne the marks of Our Lord's wounds. Again I saw   her running along the choir-grate, mounting upon the altar, or seizing the priest's   hand. Her perilousflights made me reflect on myself, and I took every   precaution not to yield to these states.

「我时常无法抵御这种神魂超拔，在同伴面前我的灵魂进入了坐忘的境界。有一天我在歌咏团，没有和其他人一起唱歌，因当时我出神了，身体一动不动，修女们碰巧推了我一下，我就倒在地上。当她们把我抬出去的时候，我看到一位修女在屋顶的最高处走动，那里是没有人能去的地方，我被告知那是德帕奇的圣玛大肋纳，她身上留下了我们主的圣伤。又一次。我看到她沿着歌咏团的栅栏奔跑，登上祭台，或抓住神父的手。她危险的奔跑使我反思自己，我采取一切预防措施，不让自已处于这种超凡状态。

My Sisters   understood nothing of the kind and they, at first, reproached me severely for   remaining in the chapel prostrate, my arms extended. But as I could not prevent   those raptures, I tried to hide myself from them in a corner. Despite my   efforts, however, I was ravished out of myself, sometimes in one place,   sometimes in another. I lay prostrate, stiff, and immovable, or I knelt with   outstretched arms. The chaplain often found me in this state. I always longed   to see St. Teresa, because I had heard that she had suffered much from her   confessors. The favor was vouchsafed me. I did see her several times, sick   and weak, writing at a table or in bed. I thought there was a close   friendship between her and Magdalen di Pazzi. It was revealed to me that   Magdalen from her infancy was pleasing to God, on accouut of her simplicity   and ardent love.

我的姐妹们对此一无所知，起初，她们严厉责备我，不让我在小圣堂里张开双臂伏地祈祷。但由于我无法避免那些神魂超拔，我试图躲在角落里躲避她们。然而，尽管我付出了努力，我还是神魂超拔了，有时在一个地方，有时在另一个地方。我伏在地上、僵直不动，或者我伸开双臂跪在地上。本堂神父经常发现我处于这种状态。我一直渴望见到圣女大德兰，因为我听说她从她的告解神师那里受了很多苦。这恩惠赐给了我。我确实见过圣女大德兰好几次，她身体虚弱，在桌子上或床上写字。我认为她和德帕奇的玛大肋纳之间有着密切的友谊。神视启示给我，玛大肋纳从婴儿时就讨天主喜悦，因为她的质朴和热烈的爱。

"In   my duties as sacristan I was often lifted up suddenly, and I stood on the   highest points of the church, on the windows, the carving, and the cornices,   cleaning and dusting where humanly speaking no one could go. I was not   frightened when I felt myself thus raised and held up in the air, for I had   always been accustomed to my angel’s assistance. Sometimes when I awoke, I   found myself sitting in a large closet in which were kept things belonging to   the sacristy ; sometimes I was in a corner near the altar where not a soul   could see me, and I cannot understand how I squeezed into it without tearing   my habit. But sometimes on awaking, I found myself seated on the highest   rafter of the roof. This generally happened when I had hidden myself to weep.   I often saw Magdalen di Pazzi mounting up in this way and running over the   rafters, the scaffolding, and the altars. “

「在我担任圣器管理员时，我经常被突然托起站在教堂的最高处、站在窗户、雕花、飞檐上，在人迹罕至的地方打扫卫生、擦拭灰尘。当我感觉自己就这样被升起并悬在空中时，我并不害怕，因为我一直习惯了护守天神的帮助。有时当我醒来时，我发现自己坐在一个大壁橱里，里面放着属于圣器室的东西；有时我在靠近祭坛附近的一个角落里，那里没有一个人可以看到我，我不明白我是怎么挤进去而不损坏我的会服的。有时一觉醒来，我发现自己坐在屋顶最高的椽子上。这通常发生在我躲起来哭泣的时候。我经常这样的看到德帕奇的玛大肋纳在屋顶，椽子、脚手架、祭坛上奔跑。」

Dean   Overberg deposed : —

"   Anne Catherine often had ecstasies   in the convent, especially during   the last four years of its existence.   Everywhere, in the cloister, the   garden, the church, and her cell, was she   accustomed to sink down upon   the ground. They came on chiefly when she was   alone, though she had   slight raptures in the refectory; but she used to beg   God not to send   them to her there. It seemed to her that the rapture lasted   only a   moment, though she afterward found that it was much longer.

奥弗伯格总铎作证：

「安纳．加大利纳．艾曼丽经常在修道院里出现神魂超拔，尤其是在修道院存在的最后四年里。在回廊、花园、教堂和她的房间里，她总是惯性般地瘫倒在地上。神魂超拔主要是当她独自一人的时候来到，虽然她在餐厅里有轻微的出神；但她曾经恳求天主不要让她在餐厅时出现神魂超拔。在她看来，出神只持续了片刻，但她后来发现，这种狂喜持续的时间要长得多。

"I   asked her if she knew how to distinguish between ordinary fainting-spells and   ecstasies. She answered: 'In fainting-spells from weakness, I am very, very   sick as if about to die; but in the other state, I know not that I have a   body. I am often quite joyous, or again sad. I rejoice in God ‘s mercy toward   sinners, lovingly leading them back to Himself; or I mourn over the sins of   mankind, I am sad at seeing God so horribly offended.

「奥弗伯格总铎问她是否知道如何区分普通的昏厥和神魂超拔。她回答说：『在因虚弱而昏厥时，我非常非常难受，好像快要死了；但在神魂超拔状态下，我不知道自已还有一个身体。我时而欢喜，时而悲伤。我因天主对罪人的怜悯，慈爱地引领他们回到天主的身边而欢喜；或为人类的罪孽悲哀，为看到天主受到如此可怕地冒犯而伤心。

 “‘In   my meditation I looked up to heaven and there I saw God. When in desolation,   I seemed to be walking in a path scarcely a finger in breath, on either side   deep, dark abysses; above me all was blooming and beautiful, and at   resplendent youth led me by the hand over the perilous path. I used to hear   at this time the voice of God saying to me: “My grace is sufficient for   thee!" — and the words were sweet to my soul.' "

「在默观中，我仰望天堂，在那里我看到了天主。当孤寂的时候，我仿佛走在一条伸手不见五指的小路上，两边都是幽暗的深渊；在我之上，一切都绽放出美丽的光彩，光彩夺目的青年牵着我的手走过危险的道路。在这个时候，我常常听到天主的声音对我说：『我的恩宠为你够用！ 』——这些话甜到我的心里。」  

Frequently   during her ecstasies, Sister Emmerich received from her angel an order to   bring the Sisters back to the strict observance of the Rule. Then, still in   ecstasy and shedding abundant tears, she would appear in their midst and   quote the Rules on silence, obedience, poverty, the Divine Office, enclosure,   and others most often infringed; or again, she would cast herself at the feet   of a Sister in whose heart she saw aversion or even downright hatred, and beg   her to pardon, to be charitable, helping her to resist the temptation, and   pointing out the guilt of entertaining such feelings.

艾曼丽修女经常在神魂超拔期间收到天神的命令，让她带领修女们重新严格遵守会规。然后，她仍然在神魂超拔中，流下大量的眼泪，出现在修女们中间，引述关于静默、服从、神贫、日课经、禁闭和其他最常被违反的会规；又或者，艾曼丽修女会俯伏在一位内心厌恶她甚至完全仇恨她的修女的脚下，恳求她宽恕、请求她的仁慈，帮助她抵制诱惑，并指出她怀着这种情绪是有罪的。

The   religious generally yielded to her persuasions and opened to her their   interior, begging her advice and prayers to correct. If, however, they found   the former too difficult to follow, they indulged fits of pettishness and   mistrust, and hence arose fresh suspicions in those weak souls. They imagined   that Sister Emmerich had now ever before her mind their faults and   imperfections whilst, in reality, she received such communications as those   given her in vision. She guarded their confidence as a sacred deposit with   the sole view of rendering glory to God and assistance to souls in need.

虔诚的修女们通常都会服从于她的劝说，向她敞开心扉，为纠正错误而恳求她的建议和祈祷。然而，如果她们觉得会规太难持守，她们就会放纵自己的脾气并不信任她，从而在那些软弱的灵魂中产生新的怀疑。她们以为艾曼丽修女的脑海里总是浮现着她们的缺点和不完美，而实际上，艾曼丽接受的是异象中的信息。艾曼丽将修女们的信任视为神圣的宝藏，唯一的目的就是归光荣给天主，帮助有需要的灵魂。

 “It   often happened," she said, “that whilst doing my work or, perhaps, lying   in bed sick, I was in spirit among my sisters. I saw and heard all they did   and said, and sometimes I found myself in the church before the Blessed   Sacrament, though without leaving my cell. I cannot explain how it was. The   first time this happened I thought it was a dream. I was in my fifteenth year   and absent from home. I had been urged to pray for a giddy young girl that   she might not be led astray. One night I saw a snare laid for her. In an   agony, I ran to her room and put to flight a servant-man of the house whom I   found at her door. When I entered the chamber, she was in a state of   consternation.

「这经常发生，」艾曼丽说，「在我工作时，或者是生病躺在床上时，我在灵里和我的姐妹们在一起。她们的一言一行我都看在眼里，听在耳里，有时我发现自己在教堂里，虽然没有离开我的房间，但却来到了圣龛前。我无法解释这是怎么回事。第一次发生这种情况时，我以为是在做梦。那时我十五岁，不在家。有人劝我为一位轻佻的年轻女孩祈祷，希望她不要误入歧途。一天夜里，我看到了一个为她设下的陷阱。在痛苦中，我跑到她的房间，在她家门口发现了一名男仆人，我把他赶走了。当我走进她的房间时，她正惊惶得不知所措。

Now, I   really had not left my bed, and I thought it was all a dream. Next morning,   however, the girl could not look me in the face and she afterwards told me   the whole affair and thanked me repeatedly, saying that I had freed her from   the tempter, that I had entered her room and saved her from sin. Then,   indeed, I regarded the circumstance as something more than a dream. Such   things often occurred at a later period. A woman, whom I had never seen, came   to me in great excitement, thanked me with many tears, and recounted her fall   and conversion. I recognized her as one for whom I had been told in vision to   pray.

现在，我真的是没有离开我的床，我还以为这一切都是一场梦。然而，第二天早上，女孩不能正视我的脸，后来她把整个事情经过告诉了我，并反复感谢我，说我已经把她从诱惑者手中解救出来，说我进入了她的房间，把她从罪恶之中拯救出来。于是，真的，我也确实认为这不仅仅只是一个梦。这样的事情在后来经常发生。一位我从未见过面的女人激动地来到我面前，流着泪感谢我，讲述了她的堕落和悔改。我认出她就是我在异象中被告知要为之祈祷的人。

"It   was not always in spirit only, as in the above cases, that I was sent to the   assistance of poor tempted souls. I used to go really in body also. The   servant-girls of the convent slept in the out-buildings. Once when I was very   ill, I beheld at night two persons conversing together apparently on pious   subjects, but their hearts were full of evil thoughts. I arose in the dark,   but seeing my way clearly notwithstanding, I went through the cloister to separate   them. When they saw me coming they fled in affright, and afterward they   showed ill-humor toward me. As I returned I awoke. I was only half-way up the   stairs that led to the convent, and I regained my cell with great difficulty   as I was so weak.

「我并不总是像上述情况那样，只是在灵里被派去帮助那些受诱惑的可怜人，我的身体也真的去了。女修道院的女仆们睡在外屋。有一次，我病得很重，晚上看到两个人在一起交谈，表面上是在谈论虔诚的话题，但她们的内心却充满了邪恶的想法。我摸黑起床，但还是看清了路，穿过回廊去把她们分开。当她们看到我走过来时，她们吓得逃走了，之后她们对我表现出了敌意。当我返回修院时，我刚爬到通往修道院的楼梯的一半，就醒了。由于身体虚弱，我好不容易才回到自己的房间。

"On   another occasion, one of the sisters thought she saw me at the kitchen fire   taking something away in a vessel to eat in private, and again, gathering   fruit in the garden for the same purpose. She ran instantly to tell the   Superioress; but, when they came to inquire into it, they found me in bed   sick unto death. These incidents made my state a very embarrassing one, and   the religious knew not what to think of me."

「还有一次，一位修女好像看到我在厨房的火炉边，私下用餐具拿东西吃，然后又在花园里摘水果吃。她立刻跑去告诉女院长，但当她们来询问时，却发现我躺在床上病得要死。这些事情让我的处境非常尴尬，修女们不知道该怎么看我。」

From   Sister Emmerich's entrance into the convent, no suffering seemed to her   sufficiently great to outweigh the supreme privilege of dwelling under the   same roof with the Blessed Sacrament, of passing a greater part of her, day   before It. When at work in her cell or elsewhere, she involuntarily turned   toward the church, for the sentiment of the real and living presence of her   Lord was never absent from her heart. Nothing could oppose a barrier to her   loving communings. The very thought of the Blessed Eucharist threw her into   ecstasy and, if untrammelled by the commands of obedience, she found herself   prostrate on the altar-steps, although corporeally at a distance.

从艾曼丽修女进入修道院开始，在她看来，能与圣体同住一个屋檐下，能在圣龛前渡过一天大部分时间，这是天主给她的特大的恩宠，为此，再大的痛苦她都能承受。无论她在房间或其它地方工作时，她都不由自主地转向圣堂，因为在她心中天主真实而鲜活的临在从未缺席。没有什么能阻挡她与主之间爱的交流。一想到圣体圣事，她就会陶醉其中，如果不是受到服从命令的约束，她会俯伏在祭台的台阶上，尽管身体还离祭台很远。

In all   that her Rule exacted of her, she discovered something bearing reference to   the Blessed Sacrament and she was, consequently, as faithful to the least as   to the greatest duty. Her charge of the sacristy she regarded as essentially   sacred, to be attended to at any cost of physical suffering, since it was the   service of the King of kings, a privilege the angels might well envy. Truly   and at all times did she turn toward Jesus on the altar as a flower to the   sun; all her thoughts and affections were His, all sent up to Him the sweet   odor of love and sacrifice. Her sufferings for the Blessed Sacrament were   great as her love, for no sins cried more loudly to heaven, none had greater need   of expiation than those directed against faith in the Real Presence.

在所有她实行的会规中，艾曼丽发现了一些与圣体有关的事，所以，她对最小的职责和对最大的职责一样忠信。她所负责照管圣器的职务在她看来是非常神圣的，她不惜任何身体痛苦的代价来照顾，因为这是为万王之王服务，是使天神都羡慕的特权。她总是转向祭坛，就像鲜花向着太阳一样，她转向着祭坛上的耶稣；她所有的思想和感情都切望耶稣，都是在向耶稣传递爱和牺牲的馨香。她的爱有多大，她为圣体所受的痛苦就有多大，因为没有比那些反对圣体真实临在的信仰之罪，需要更大的补赎和向天堂更大声地呼求了。

It was at   this period, as we have before remarked, that Jansenism aimed at banishing   the Unbloody Sacrifice of the altar and the veneration of Mary, the Mother of   God. These abominations filled her soul with anguish as she knelt before the   altar and shared with the Heart of Jesus the sorrow occasioned by such   outrages. To none other could He turn, since His most cruel enemies were   numbered among those whose sacerdotal character gave them unlimited power   over this pledge of His love for man. Her ardor led her at night to the   church to kneel in the cold before its closed doors, shedding tears of love   and desire until day-light gave her admittance, for her only relief was found   in the presence of her Saviour.

正如我们之前所提到的那样，正是在这个时期，詹森主义的目的旨在取缔祭坛的不流血祭献和对天主之母玛利亚的敬礼。当艾曼丽跪在祭台前，并与耶稣的圣心一起分担这种暴行所带来的悲痛时，这些可憎的事情使她的灵魂充满了痛苦。耶穌不能求助于其他任何人，因为他最凶残的敌人的徒子徒孙已混入司铎的队伍，他们披着司铎的祭衣，行使耶稣赋予司铎的神圣权力，却任意曲解圣经和圣传，破坏教会的传统和耶稣对人类爱的承诺。艾曼丽的热情使她夜里来到教堂，在寒冷中跪在教堂紧闭的门前，流下了爱与渴望的泪水，直到天亮，圣堂开门她才能进堂，因为只有在救主耶稣的座前，她才能得到慰藉。

Her   sufferings were as varied as the sins of that period against the Blessed   Sacrament, and she did penance for every affront offered It, from the   tepidity and indifference of the faithful in receiving Holy Communion to the   sacrilegious insults of Its greatest enemies. She would have sunk under the   weight of this terrible mission, had not God effaced its impressions from her   soul and inundated her, at times, with consolation. The more lively her   intuition of the grandeur and magnificence of this great Sacrament, the more   ardent became her devotion toward It, the greater her veneration. Her   reverence for It, joined to the deep feeling of her own unworthiness,   sometimes filled her with such fear that it was only obedience could make her   approach the Holy Table. She believed herself responsible, on account of her   own imperfections, for the numerous infractions of charity and the Rule   committed by the Sisters, and this fear prevented her approaching Holy   Communion as often as she might have done.

她所受的苦难就像那个时代人们对圣体所犯的罪一样地多种多样，她为圣体的每一次受到的冒犯做补赎，从信友领受圣体时的不温不火和冷漠，到圣体被恶魔的亵渎性侮辱。如果不是天主从她的灵魂中抹去这些亵渎的印象，并时不时地给她以安慰，她就会在痛苦的重压下沉没。她对宏伟壮丽的圣体圣事的直觉越是生动，她的恭敬和尊崇就越热忱。她的崇敬，加上自己不配的深切感受，有时使她充满了恐惧，只有在服从之下才能使她接近祭台。她认为，由于自己的不完美，她要对修女们犯下的许多违反爱德和会规的行为负责，这种恐惧使她无法像以前那样经常去领圣体。

Dean   Overberg says : —

“Her   confessor wanted her to communicate oftener than the other religious, and she   obeyed for some time ; but, from the Purification till Pentecost, she   abstained through human respect, because she was accused of mock sanctity and   all kinds of remarks were made on the subject. Besides, she looked upon   herself as unfit to communicate so often and she fell into a state of   sadness. At last, she recognized her fault, and resumed her custom of   frequent Communion, though for two years she had to atone for her disobedience   on this point, all consolation being withdrawn from her.

奥弗伯格总铎说：

「艾曼丽的告解神师希望她比其他修女更频繁地领圣体，她服从了一段时间；但是，从斋期到五旬节，她出于人的看法而放弃了，因为她被指责为假圣洁，人们就这个问题说三道四。此外，她认为自己不适合如此频繁地领圣体，她陷入了悲伤之中。终于，她认识到了自己的错误，恢复了经常领圣体的习惯，尽管在两年的时间里，她不得不为自己在这一点上的忤逆而補赎，所有的安慰都从她身上撤回了。

"At   the end of this time, her peace of soul returned; and so great was her desire   for the Holy Eucharist that she could not wait for the usual hour. Her   confessor arranged for her to receive before the community arose on days not   marked for all to communicate that, being less remarked, the circumstance   might create less talk. Early in the morning she used to knock at the Abbe   Lambert's door, who kindly went to the church and gave her Holy Communion.

「在这段时间结束后，她的灵魂又恢复了平静；她对基督圣体的渴望如此强烈，以至于她不能等待到通常的时间领圣体。她的告解神师安排她在每天修道院的修女们起床之前先领圣体，不与修女们一起领圣体，不引人注意，这样一来她就可以少受人们议论。一大早，她就去敲兰伯特神父的门，他好心地去圣堂给她送圣体。

But   sometimes she presented herself before the appointed hour, and on one   occasion, even shortly after midnight, so great was her longing for the Holy   Eucharist. Her whole soul was on fire, and so violently was she impelled   toward the church that she felt as if her limbs were being torn from her   body. The Abbe was not, as might be supposed, any too well pleased on hearing   her knock at his door at such an hour; but on seeing the state in which she   was, he went and gave her Holy Communion.

但有时她会在约定的时间之前出现，有一次，甚至在午夜过后不久，她对圣体的渴望是如此强烈，她的整个灵魂都在燃烧，她被如此猛烈地推向圣堂，以至于她感觉自己的四肢都要被从身体上扯下来了。神父在这个时间听到她的敲门，心里并不是很高兴。但是在看到她的状态后，他就去给她送了圣体。

"She   assisted at Mass with intense devotion. When the celebrant began: ‘In nomine   Patris,’ etc., she contemplated Jesus on the Mount of Olives, and begged for   the Faithful the grace of assisting devoutly at the Holy Sacrifice and for   priests that of offering It in a manner pleasing to God; lastly, she implored   Our Lord to cast upon all as gracious a look as He once cast on St. Peter.

「艾曼丽以强烈的虔敬参与弥撒。当主祭开始说：『因父…之名』时，艾曼丽默观耶稣在橄榄园中，艾曼丽为信友祈求会虔诚地参与圣祭的恩宠，并为神父祈求会以讨天主喜悦的方式献上祭献；最后，艾曼丽恳求我们的主耶穌用祂曾经投向圣伯多禄那样仁慈的目光投向所有人。

"At   the Gloria, she praised God in union with the Church Triumphant and the   Church Militant, giving thanks for the daily renewal of the Holy Sacrifice,   and imploring God to enlighten all men and console the poor souls in   purgatory.

 「在光荣颂中，艾曼丽与凯旋教会和征战教会联合赞美天主，感谢每天更新信友的圣祭，并祈求天主启迪所有人，安慰炼狱中的可怜灵魂。

"'At   the Gospel, she asked for all the Faithful the grace to practise fully the   evangelical teachings.

"At   the Offertory, she presented to God the bread and wine with the priest,   praying that they might be changed into the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ,   and she whispered to her heart that the moment was drawing near for the advent   of the Saviour.

「在福音中，她为所有信友祈求恩宠，以充分实践福音的教诲。

「在奉献礼中，她和神父一起将饼和酒献给天主，祈求它们能变成耶稣基督的圣体和圣血，她在心里悄悄地说，救主降临的时刻即将来临。

"At   the Sanctus, she called upon the whole world to praise God with her.

"At   the Consecration, she offered the Saviour to His Father for the whole world,   chiefly for the conversion of sinners, for the relief of the souls in   purgatory, for the dying, and for her sisters in religion. She imagined the   altar surrounded at this moment by crowds of adoring angels who dared not   raise their eyes to the Sacred Host. She said to herself that, although it   might be very bold in her, Jet she could not deprive herself of the consolation   of gazing upon her Lord.

「在圣哉经（圣圣圣）中，艾曼丽呼吁全世界与她一起赞美天主。

「在成圣体时，她为全世界将救主耶稣献给天主圣父，主要是为使罪人悔改、为炼狱中的灵魂、为临终灵魂的慰藉、和为修会中的姐妹们。她想象这一刻祭台被崇敬的天神围绕着，天神们不敢抬头仰视圣体。艾曼丽对自己说，虽然这在她看来可能是大胆的不敬，但她不能失去凝视主带给她的安慰。

"She   often saw a brilliant light surrounding the Sacred Host and in the Host a   cross of dark color, never white. Had it been white, she could not have   distinguished it. It did not seem to be larger than the Host, but the latter   was Itself often larger than usual.

「她经常看到圣体周围环绕着耀眼的光芒，在圣体中有一个深色的十字架，绝不是白色。如果是白色，她就无法辨认出来。十字架似乎并不比圣体大，但(她看到的)圣体本身却常常比平时(领受的圣体)大。

"From   the Elevation to the Agnus Dei, she prayed for the souls in purgatory,   presenting Jesus on the Cross to His Father that He might accomplish what she   could not. At this moment, she was often rapt out of herself and, indeed, she   sometimes fell into ecstasy even before the Consecration.

「从举扬圣体到羔羊颂，艾曼丽为炼狱中的灵魂祈祷，将十字架上的耶稣呈现给祂的天父，希望圣父能完成她不能完成的事。此时，她经常出神，事实上，她有时甚至在成圣体之前就神魂超拔。

"At   the Communion, she reflected on Christ laid in the tomb, and begged Almighty   God to annihilate in us the old man and clothe us with the new.

「在领圣体时，艾曼丽想到了安放在坟墓里的基督，恳求全能的上主在我们里面消灭旧人，给我们穿上新人。

"If   at Mass or any other service, she listened to the music, she would exclaim :   ‘Ah, how sweet is harmony! Inanimate creatures accord so perfectly, why   should not men's hearts do the same! How charming that would be!’ — and the   thought made her shed tears.

「如果在弥撒或其它仪式上聆听音乐，她会感叹道：『啊，和谐是多么甜蜜！无生命的受造物都如此完美地融合在一起，为什么人心不能这样！那该是多么迷人啊！』——想到这里，她不禁潸然泪下。

"Once,   during the Christmas Midnight- Mass, she saw the Infant Jesus above the   chalice, and what appeared to her strange was that the celebrant seemed to   hold the Infant by the feet, notwithstanding which, she saw the chalice too.   She often saw an Infant in the Host, but He was very small. "

「有一次，在圣诞节午夜弥撒时，她看到圣婴耶稣在圣爵上方，令她感到奇怪的是，主祭似乎抓住圣婴的脚，尽管如此，她还是看到了圣爵。她经常看到圣体里有一个小圣婴，圣婴非常小。

 “When   she was sacristan, she occupied for a time a place in choir from which she   could not see the altar, having given hers up to a Sister who was tormented   with scruples when she heard Mass without enjoying that consolation.

「当艾曼丽担任圣器管理员时，她曾一度在歌咏团中占有一席，从那位置无法看到祭台，因为她把自己原来的位置让给了一位修女，那修女在望弥撒时被疑虑折磨而没有享受到天主的安慰。

One day as   she was watching to ring the bell for the Elevation, she saw the Infant Jesus   above the chalice, — how beautiful! She thought herself in heaven. She was   about to leap through the grate to get at the Child when suddenly   recollecting herself, she exclaimed: ‘My God! what am I going to do?’— She   succeeded in restraining herself, but forgot to sound the bell, a frequent   omission of hers which drew upon her many a reprimand."

一天，当她集中注意力准备摇响举扬圣体的铃声时，她看到了圣爵上方的婴儿耶稣——多么美丽！她以为自己在天堂。她正要越过圣体栏去抱圣婴耶稣，突然回过神来，惊呼道：「我的天主啊！我该怎么办？」——她成功地克制住了自己，但忘了摇铃，这是她经常疏忽的，这使她招致了许多谴责。

Clara   Soentgen says : " When Sister Emmerich received Holy Communion her   bodily strength increased. She loved, above all, to communicate on Thursday   in honor of the Blessed Sacrament; but, as this gave rise to remark, she   obtained permission from her confessor to communicate in secret. Sometimes   she went to receive a little after midnight, sometimes at three or four   o'clock in the morning, her ardent desire rendering it impossible for her to   wait longer.

克拉拉．索恩根说：「艾曼丽修女领受圣体后，她身体的力量增强了。最重要的是，她喜欢在周四领圣体以光荣圣体圣事；但是，由于这引起了议论，她获得了她的告解神师的许可私下领圣体。有时她半夜才去领圣体，有时是凌晨三四点钟，她的渴望让她无法等更久。

"Once   I asked her why she wore her best habit on Thursdays, and she answered that   it was in honor of the Blessed Sacrament. She rarely made use of a book   before or after Communion."

「有一次我问她，为什么她在周四穿着她最好的会衣，她回答说这是为了光荣圣体圣事。她很少在领圣体之前或之后使用祈祷书。」

Sister   Emmerich herself speaks as follows: — "I very often saw blood flowing   from the cross on the Sacred Host; I saw it distinctly. Sometimes Our Lord,   in the form of an Infant, appeared like a lightning-flash in the Sacred Host.   At the moment of communicating, I used to see my Saviour like a bridegroom   standing by me and, when I had received He disappeared, leaving me filled   with the sweet sense of His presence. He pervades the whole soul of the   communicant just as sugar is dissolved in water, and the union between the   soul and Jesus is always in proportion to the soul’s desire to receive   Him."

艾曼丽修女本人是这样说的：「我经常看到血从圣体中的十字架流出；我看得很清楚。有时我们的主以婴儿的形像，象闪电一样快地临在圣体中。领圣体的那一刻，我常常看到我的救赎主像新郎一样站在我身边，当我领受圣体后，祂就消失了，让我充满了与祂同在的甜蜜感觉。就像糖溶解在水中一样，祂进入领圣体者的整个灵魂中，灵魂与耶稣之间的结合（程度）总是与灵魂渴望领受祂的（程度）成正比。」

Dean   Overberg gives the following account of her prayer: — “Before she entered   religion, Anne Catherine prayed for sinners and the souls in purgatory. In   the convent she prayed also for her companions, rarely for her own wants.   Save those prescribed by Rule, she said few vocal prayers, but made use of   frequent ejaculations. She spoke to God as a child to its father and   generally obtained what she asked.

奥弗伯格总铎对艾曼丽修女的祈祷作了以下描述：「在她进入修会之前，安纳．加大利纳就为罪人和炼狱中的灵魂祈祷。在修院里，她也为她的同伴祈祷，很少为她自己的需要祈祷。除了会规规定的那些祈祷外，她几乎没有口祷，而是使用了频繁的热心短祷。她像小孩子对父亲说话那样向天主祈祷，并得到了她所祈求的。

"Her   communing with God ceased neither day nor night, even at table it was not   interrupted. She was often unconscious of what was said there, and if the   Sisters made remarks about her at such times, she rarely perceived it.

「她与天主的交流日夜不停，甚至在餐桌上也没有中断。她经常对周围的人所说的话无意识，即使修女们在这种时候议论她，她也很少察觉到。

 “Abbe   Lambert asked her one day at the end of one of the meals: — ‘How could you   listen so quietly to what passed at table!’— when she answered that she had   heard nothing of what was said.

「有一天吃完饭兰伯特神父问她：『你怎么能这么安静地听餐桌上的谈话呢！』——她回答说她什么都没听到。

 “She   had, at one time, the habit of disputing with God on two points: that He did   not convert all the big sinners, and that He punished the impenitent with   everlasting pains. She told Him that she could not understand how He could   act thus, so contrary to His nature, which is goodness itself, as it would be   easy for Him to convert sinners since all are in His hand. She reminded Him   of all that He and His Son had done for them; of the latter's having shed His   Blood and given His life for them upon the cross; of His own words and   promises of mercy contained in the Scriptures. She asked Him with holy   boldness, how could He expect men to keep their word, if He did not keep   His?"

「她曾一度习惯于在两点上与天主争论：

（一）至善的天主没有归化所有的大罪人；

（二）天主用永远的痛苦惩罚那些不悔改的人。

她告诉天主，她无法理解天主怎么会这样做，这与祂的本性——善的本身——是背道而驰的，因为天主很容易改变罪人，因为一切都在祂的手中。她提醒天主祂和祂的圣子为罪人所做的一切；圣子在十字架上为他们流了血，为他们献出了生命；祂自己的话语和圣经中所包含的怜悯罪人和对罪人慈悲的应许。艾曼丽以圣洁的心大胆地问天主，如果祂不遵守祂自己的诺言，祂怎么能指望世人遵守诺言呢？」

 “The   Abbe Lambert, to whom she recounted this dispute, said to her: ‘Softly! you   go too far!’ and she soon saw that God is right; for, if He did convert all   sinners or if the pains of hell were not to last forever, man would forget   that there is a God.

「她向兰伯特神父讲述了这争执，兰伯特神父对她说：『轻声些！你太过分了！』她很快就看出天主是对的；因为，如果天主真的归化了所有的罪人，或者如果地狱的痛苦不会永远持续下去，人就会忘记有一位天主。

 “She   had great confidence in the Mother of God to whom she turned whenever she had   committed a fault, saying: 'O Mother of my Saviour, thou art doubly my Mother!   Thy Son gave thee to me for mother when He said to John: ‘Behold thy   Mother!' and then again, I am the spouse of thy Son. I have been   disobedient to Him, I am ashamed to appear before Him. do thou pity me! A   mother's heart is always so good! Ask Him to forgive me, He cannot refuse   thee."

「艾曼丽对天主之母充满信心，每当她犯错时，她就会转向圣母求助，她说：『我救赎主的母亲啊，你是我的双重母亲！你的圣子把你赐给我做母亲，祂对若望说：“看你的母亲！”是你的圣子将你给我作为母亲，再说，我又是你圣子的净配。我一直不顺服祂，我羞于出现在祂面前，求祢怜悯我！母亲的心总是那么善良！你代我求祂宽恕我吧，祂不能拒绝你的。』

"One   day just before the suppression of the convent, when she had sought in vain   for consolation among her sisters, she ran weeping to the church and   prostrated in agony before the Blessed Sacrament crying for pardon, for she   was overwhelmed by the thought that she alone was the cause of all the evil   in the house. ‘O God, I am the prodigal child!’ she cried; 'I have squandered   my inheritance, I am not worthy to be called Thy child! Have pity on me! I   ask it through my sweetest Mother, who is Thy Mother, too!’ — then the voice   of God sounded in her soul bidding her be at peace, that His grace would   suffice for her, and that she should no more seek consolation from creatures.

「就在修道院被取缔前的一天，当她在修女中寻求安慰无果时，她哭泣着跑到教堂，痛苦地跪在圣龛前，哭着请求宽恕，因为她想到自己一个人就是修院里所有罪恶的根源，她被这种想法压垮了。『天主啊，我是个浪子！』她哭了：『我浪费了祢給我的产业，我不配被称为祢的孩子！可怜可怜我吧！我是通过我最亲爱的母亲来请求的，她也是祢的母亲！』——这时，天主的声音在她心灵深处响起，呼唤她要平静下来，天主的恩宠足够她用的，她不应再向任何人寻求安慰了。 

 “Often,   when begging some favor most earnestly and making great promises to Our Lord,   she heard these words: — ' How canst thou promise great things, when little   ones are so difficult to thee !' "

当她最恳切地向我们的主乞求帮助并做出伟大的承诺时，她经常听到这些话：『当小事对你来说还如此困难时，你怎么能承诺伟大的事情！』」

The   following is Dean Rensing's deposition: "Sister Emmerich said the   prescribed prayers with the religious, and some other vocal prayers; but when   she prayed interiorly she laid her request before God and in the depths of   her heart begged to be favorably heard. She added an Our Father or some other   short prayer, often going so far as to dispute the point with the Almighty.

以下是伦辛总铎的证词：「艾曼丽和修女们一起念规定的祷文，还做了一些其他的口祷；但是当她在内心祈祷时，她将自己的请求放在天主面前，并在她内心深处恳求天主垂听。她还加上天主经或其它一些简短的祷文，甚至经常与全能的天主争论。

 “She   loved mental better than vocal prayer. She asked herself: ‘What ought you to   be, and what are you?’ — and then she went on until her meditation had been   greatly prolonged, not knowing herself how she had passed from point to   point."

「与口祷相比，艾曼丽更喜欢心祷。她问自己：『你应该成为什么样的人，你又是什么样的人？』——然后她持续往下默想，直到她的默想被大大延长了，连她自已也不知道是如何从一个默想到另一个默想的。」

Clara   Soentgen says: — “Sister Emmerich told me that from the Ascension to   Pentecost, her state of contemplation was uninterrupted. She saw the   disciples assembled together praying for the coming of the Holy Ghost, and   she herself was present with them. This had happened to her even before her   entrance into religion. During the ten days of preparation, she used to   receive Holy Communion several times. I sat by her at table in the convent,   and she was so absorbed at this time that I used to have to remind her to   eat."

克拉拉．索恩根说：「艾曼丽修女告诉我，从耶稣升天到圣神降临节，她的默观状态从末中断。她看到宗徒们聚集在一起祈求圣神降临，她自己也和宗徒们在一起。这甚至在她进入修会之前就发生在她身上。在十天的准备期间，她曾多次领圣体。在修院的就餐时，我坐在她身边，当时她全神贯注，以至于我不得不提醒她吃饭。　」

Anne   Catherine tells us :—

“I cannot   use the prayers of the Church translated into German. I find them insipid and   tiresome, though in Latin they are full and intelligible; however, I can   confine myself to no set form of speech. I was always glad when we had to   sing hymns and response in Latin; the feast was then more real to me, I saw all   that I sang. When we sang the Litany of the Blessed Virgin in Latin, I used   to see one after another in a most wonderful manner all the symbolical   figures of Mary. It seemed as if I uttered the pictures. At first, it   frightened me, but soon I found what a great favor it was, as it excited my   devotion. I saw the most wonderful pictures!"

安纳．加大利纳．艾曼丽告诉我们：

「我无法使用翻译成德语的教会祷文。我觉得它们索然无味，尽管把拉丁语中的祈祷文译成德语通俗易懂，但是，我不能将自己限制在固定形式的口祷中。当我们必须用拉丁语唱圣咏和答唱咏时，我总是很高兴；那时的盛宴对我来说更加真实，我看到了我所唱的一切。当我们用拉丁语唱《圣母德叙祷文》时，我常常以最奇妙的方式看到一个又一个圣母玛利亚的象征性形象。当我用拉丁语咏唱时，我仿佛唤出了这些图像。起初，这让我感到害怕，但很快我就发现这是多么大的恩惠，因为它激发了我的虔诚。我看到了最奇妙的画面！」